purple skies in Bali.
Gazing at a sky flooded with soft purples, I propped my chin on my hand, my mind coming to a slow. My eyes drifted lazily between the skies to the mountain to the rice paddies and back to the skies again.
This view mesmerizes me. I have no words, only a body humming softly in waves. My entire being feels at ease, like it belongs.
"But… belongs where?"
Here, in Sedimen? That doesn't feel quite right.
After all, I live in Singapore.
Sometime later, as I chewed on a piece of tempeh I'd dipped in peanut sauce, a thought came to me.
Maybe this place makes me feel like I belong within myself.
Yes, that sounds better.
Something about this place, this moment in time, makes me feel… right.
I feel ‘right’ being in my body. I feel ‘right’ being me.
My mind and heart and body feel like they fit well together, if that makes sense?
And I feel...
"Present. Aligned, and present."
My eyebrows furrowed, and I stopped chewing. It hit me all of a sudden.
When I slow myself down to be present with the moment, I bring myself back to me.
I help myself feel safe within me.
I help myself see that I DO belong,
wherever I am, whatever I'm striving for, or struggling with in this moment.
I belong in every current moment.
So often, we run with our thoughts. We attach ourselves to anxieties and worries and stresses regarding what hasn't happened yet. Or maybe, we fail to detach ourselves from stories of the past, weighing ourselves down with what could have been; our 'what if's.
By doing so, we are constantly 'away' from ourselves.
Because we are here in this moment,
but our minds and our hearts are not here with us.
We strain these parts of us, causing our souls to wonder where we truly belong.
When we constantly keep ourselves in the past or the future,
we teach our bodies, heart and mind that we belong there.
We belong in the future, we belong in the past.
Not here, not now.
So, be aware.
What are we teaching ourselves, with the kind of thoughts and actions we choose?
— written in Sedimen, Bali, on 9th November, 2023 —
